Monday, December 30, 2013

2013.... The Year of Break Ups.

2013 seems to have been a rocky year for everyone relationship wise in my friendship circle. 

There's me and my unhealthy and on/off disastrous relationship (if you could even call it that) with the Lobster. I am a million per cent not going back there after the Christmas Eve texts. I mean it this time. 

Then there's the friend who had the whirlwind romance with the control freak chav.... we all gladly let out a sigh of relief when that one didn't work out. 

And then the one that hit us all hard... This couple - and we all have these couples - was my rock. The ones who I secretly envied with their lovely home and children and families. Both were my best friends, I would often go round there to moan and cry about my own dysfunctional relationship. 'Why?' we call cried when we heard, but these things happen for a reason. 

But through all our up's and downs us girls have stuck together and it has taught us the grass is not always greener on the other side. 

Sometimes it's better to wait for the right relationship than being in the wrong one. 

So here's to the 2014... from the Smug Singeltons. 

Don't forget, it's not just us mere mortals that have experienced the pain of heartbreak this year.... See these celebrities who also split this year. 

Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom 
It all happened very quickly but we did not see this one coming, with rumours of cheating and crack cocaine addictions... then 'that' video this just gets weirder. My heart goes out to Khloe, my favourite Kardashian. 

 Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez
A little  boy with A LOT of growing up to do it appears. 

Kris and Bruce Jenner
One that didn't surprise us but still did not see it coming. 


 Rihanna and Chris Brown. Again. 
Another dysfunctional relationship.... Played out on social media for all to see. Someone as feisty as RiRi should not allow any man to treat her the way Brown did. 

 Mirander Kerr and Orlando Bloom
'The Rock Couple' you did not expect to split :( 

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Merry Fucking Christmas you PIG!

So I have explained in previous posts who the 'Lobster' is. 

Anyhow, Christmas is always an awkward time when you make the rounds of seeing people you don't really see, and seeing as we have the same friendship group I always knew it was going to be a tiny bit awkward. 

Do I look good enough? Am I acting cool enough about? Please don't let me make the mistake of ending up in bed with him again after a few drinks. 

What I didn't expect was this torrent of abuse and venom in exchange of words after we had seen each other on Christmas Eve which left me sobbing all of Christmas morning. 


After always defending him to friends for how he has treated me, I thought I would share to show what a disgusting, non-respecting pig of man he really is. Ergh.
CUNT.